One for the Road

I'm sure both of you have noticed that I've not really updated here in the last couple of weeks. This is in part due to the holiday crunch, and the time, energy, etc. that's required in getting Santa's work done for the kids. Of course that's not the only reason, and of course I'm going to give the other like you care anyway. '

As unimportant it may be to anyone else, I'm still supremely pissed about the Imeem/MySpace thing. It was disappointing to find that the site was gone, and apparently purchased by MySpace sure, but that's not exactly what's bothering me about it, it's the fact that all of the embed boxes were replaced with ads for MySpace Music. If you've read this here blog for any length of time, you've undoubtedly read about my hatred for all things MySpace. Well their music page is definitely no exception.

See, I did 22 Infinite Playlist posts since re-starting my blog early this year, and now if you click the label over there on the right, you will be greeted with 22 MySpace Music ads, and nary a song. Sure it probably wouldn't bother anybody else, and they would just go on about their day, but that shit just really pisses me off. I wouldn't advertise for MySpace if they were fucking paying me for it.

So that being said, I'm thinking it's time to give up on the whole blogging thing again. I apologize to everybody who stops by here somewhat routinely (Linde and Brandon) looking to be mildly entertained. You know how I am, and one day I'll undoubtely return unannounced to the world of blogging, but it won't be anytime soon. It's been real guys.

Jack vs Santa

Infinite Playlist - A Very Twiztid Xmas

Sad, sad news Infinite Playlist fans, the website I've been using to post music is gone. Imeem is apparently no longer available, but MySpace cordially invites me to give "MySpace Music" a try. But of course I'm all like fuck a MySpace, so I won't be using their shitty music service and fuck them for fucking up Imeem. That being said, expect either WAY more Youtube videos, or expect this to be the last Infinite Playlist post here at the Batcave. I can sense your disappointment.

Anyway, despite my constant, near crippling depression, I have managed to get into the holiday spirit at least a little for my kids, and in an effort to spread a little bit of that around here, I give you what is probably the greatest Christmas song of all time that doesn't involve a Chipmunk, get ready for Santa with "A Very Twiztid Christmas"!

Alright, so let me get this right, you say it's a motherfucker who come to your house...
To your muthafucking house
And he ain't be trying to rob you?
Ah hell no, that's Santa Dawg, you ain't ever heard of Santa?
Nuh uh
Santa Claus, Saint Nick?
Nah
Kris Kringle?
Man nah!
You ain't ever heard of Kris Kringle?
Man Hell nah!!
Look (What?), he come down the chimney in some spots, but some people they ain't got no
chimney, so he just come in tha back dooor, he may have to kick it in though, depending
it what hood he in, cause some people be bolting they shit
Who?
You know like Kwee-Kwee and them down there on west 7 mile, you know, swinginh the herb
Fool, I know who that is, who you talking about kicking in some DOORS?
Santa, SANTA CLAUS!...Ho Ho Ho everybody's Jolly
Oh, you mean the motherfucker who be ringing the bell down in front of Churches' Chicken
Something like that, except he come and he be bringing gifts, it's like religious thing
or something
Man, you acting like a sucker believing in that Fishtishish Bullshit!
Man, I don't even like fish! so, LOOK!
WHAT?
He's looking at his list
Right
He's checking it twice
Right, Right
And he gonna know who's naughty or nice
Man, hell nah, so what you saying, this motherfucker work for the FBI? he got a list,
what kind of list?
I mean, it's kinda like that,it ain't really a list like that,I mean its Christmas list,
you know like gifts and stuff... remember when you was and you wanting Space Invaders
for the 5200 back in '86? (yea), and then nobody got it for you? (uh huh), cause you
wasn't right, Santa was like Fuck that, I ain't bringing him shit, I'mah gonna bring my
homie Lil Poot erythang.
Well fuck SANTA, and fuck you
Man fuck you man, you don't be dissing no Santa Claus, dawg
I don't be beliving in that shit, that shit ain't even real, man you acting like a
little sucker beliving in some old Santa Claus shit
Man, SANTA for life fool
*have you been a good boy this year? if not I'm gonna split your fucking head!"
With so much Drama in the D-E-T
It's kinda hard putting trimin's on my Christmas Tree
But, I some how, some way
Keep coming up with fresh ass nizzle just to drizzle on the way
May I, wrap another gift, so that I, can sneek up in your house in the bedroom
Everybody tripping, roasting chestnuts, waiting on Santa to come
I got Blaze in the living room drinking Egg-Nog
Jamie's in the kitchen and he pulling the bomb
I got Little Eric Loder dressed up like a Elf
And, all they keep saying is "go fuck yourself"
So, turn off the lights and close the doors
Man for what? Santa Claus Hoe
And, we gonna blow ounce with him
G's up, hoes down, I got Santa Claus high as shit
Chorus:
Sitting by the tree sipping Egg-Nog.
Waiting on Christmas gifts....Egg-Nog.
With my Mind on my presents
And my presents on my mind
Sitting by the tree sipping Egg-Nog
Waiting on Christmas gifts....Egg-Nog
With my mind on my presents
And my presents on my mind
Mixing Egg-Nog and Gin
everybody got their cups but they ain't chiped in
Well I called up Blaze told him, time for dime
He said him and Anybody coming through at nine
See everything is fine, cause I'm feeling all Christmassy
And I'm standing right next to the Christmas tree
Seeing the blinking lights made me sick
But I always decorate every year for Saint Nick
So, there ain't no chance he gonna pass me up
Got some Cocoa in a cup and some Hydro in a blunt
That I am gonna smoke with Santa Claus
Get him all shit-faced till the break of dawn
And, watch him fly off in the night
Hey thanks for the presents, I hope you make it home alright
Before he left he said "Hey, Listen Bro"
"Your the first stop I made, I gotta billon more to go".
*Chorus*
Later on Christmas Day
My homie Violent J
Came through with a gift for me
And a dope ass fruit cake "aight dawg",
With a phat ass joint with the blue cots
That make ya choke, with some bud, ain't no choke
Had to take a step back, sit my Egg-Nog down, knocking Rum and cot
I'm fucked up now, but ain't no body clap, the presents are wrapped
Shaggy's style through with a 40 in a sac "roll it up"
Smoke with Santa, break with the elves
They supposed to stop by at a half past twelve
*Chorus*
Shit If I would of known we was getting shit for free
I would have pulled my dick out!

Shoot em in tha Chest and Head!

Random Screen Grab of the Week

Oh. Fuck. Yes.

Mickey Rourke is soooo Gangsta

Check out the end credits to Rogue Warrior. They put some of the dialogue from Mickey Rourke to music, and the results are hilarious, though extremely NSFW.

Random Screen Grab of the Week

What the hell is Krampus?

Yeah, I said the same thing when I went to shirt.woot and purchased my latest. I bought it based solely on the art, oblivious to the fact that I was purchasing an Xmas related tee. Yep, that evil, goat-legged bastard is actually a part of Xmas. From wikipedia:

Krampus is a mythical creature who accompanies Saint Nicholas in various regions of the world during the Christmas season. The word Krampus originates from the Old High German word for claw (Krampen). In the Alpine regions, Krampus is represented by a demon-like creature accompanying Saint Nicholas. Krampus acts in conjunction with Saint Nicholas; the latter gives gifts to good children, while the Krampus gives warnings and punishments to the bad children. Traditionally, young men dress up as the Krampus in the first two weeks of December, particularly in the evening of December 5, and roam the streets frightening children and women with rusty chains and bells. In some rural areas the tradition also includes birching by Krampus, especially of young females.

Modern Krampus costumes consist of Larve (wooden masks), sheep's skin, and horns. Considerable effort goes into the manufacture of the hand-crafted masks, and many younger adults in rural communities compete in the Krampus events.

In Oberstdorf, in the southwestern alpine part of Bavaria, the tradition of der Wilde Mann ("the wild man") is kept alive. He is like Krampus (except the horns), is dressed in fur, and frightens children (and adults) with rusty chains and bells, but is not an assistant of Saint Nicholas.

Jesus! Damn Germans. Though I'm admittedly intrigued by this particular brand of scare tactic when it comes to making children behave. If my parents had told me this thing was coming to my house on Xmas if I didn't behave, I would've been an angel all year, every year. There's also apparently a movie in the works, but so far all I can find is an "under construction" webpage.

So there ya go, Krampus. Who says you can't learn anything from shirt.woot? I certainly did.

Infinite Playlist - One Eight Seven

Another from Senses Fail, hope you like.

One Eight Seven - Senses Fail

It's so nice sitting very still,
in a room where no one else can feel
the pain that breaks my heart each day, I'm not ok.
Sunlight shining through my window,
lets me know that I'm still alive
But why did I ever let you inside my heart? I'm such a fool.
Paint my face in shades of blood and grey
and take the seat right next to me
But I should have known that you were a killer. But now I'm dead.

A gaping hole, shot through my heart
A lost connection from your poison dart
Shot from your tongue to end my life.
But if you're blowing at the fire to light your strife.

You'll never know, oh yeah. You'll never know, oh no.
The hardest thing about dying is, knowing you'll never see the light of day.

A gaping hole... (shot through my heart)
A lost connection from your poison dart.
My head now spins and my ears bleed gold.
I try so fucking hard, but I can't fit your mold.

The hardest thing about dying is, knowing you'll never see the light of day. [x2]

You ripped my heart out, you tore my eyes out, now you're gonna pay
I'll stab you one time.
I'll eat your heart out, so you feel my pain.
Don't you know that I always see you in all of my dreams?

I wanna kill you. I wanna kill you. Now I'm insane. [x3]

Comic of the Week 12/3

A day later this week due to the holiday last week, damn shipping schedules. Not a lot to look forward to, and I'm feeling lazy so let's get it.

Comic of the Week

I'm assuming that most people aren't reading Batman Unseen, though I can't imagine why. It's as close to the old pre-Cataclysm days as you're gonna get and I for one enjoyed the Moench and Jones run on Batman back then. Plus it's Batman vs an invisible mad scientist. Batman. Versus an invisible mad scientist. For real. As if you needed any more coercion, solicit say this:

"The evil of the Invisible Man ends here! In order to stop the unseen Dr. Glass from killing Bruce Wayne, Batman must use the invisibility serum on himself and battle the Invisible Man on his own terms. But will The Dark Knight succumb to the same madness as the Invisible Man? Seeing is believing, but you won't believe your eyes!"

Honorable mention this week goes to Sweet Tooth #4, which has been a pleasant surprise from Vertigo. Check it out before it gets so far in the run that you're kicking yourself for not listening to Bones back in December when he told you to check it out before it got so far in the run that you kicked yourself for not listening to Bones back......

The Pull List

• Absolution #4
• Aliens #4
• Batman Confidential #38
• Batman Unseen #5
• Blackest Night Flash #1 (what? Dude, zombies!)
  
• Blackest Night Wonder Woman #1 (see above)
  
• Deadpool Team-Up #898
• Sweet Tooth #4
• X-Force Annual #1 (what? Dude, Jason Pearson totally draws this!)
  

Closet of Awesome again? So soon?!

That's right Closet fans, I'm back again already with not one, but TWO additions to my already over-flowing clothes rack. Blame Woot!, I do.

First up! Another derby loser that broke my heart, only to have me lifted back up when it became an editor's pick. I swear these dudes are just looking at what I vote for, and then picking them knowing they're guaranteed at least $10 more. Anyway, seeing this, I'm sure you understand how there's simply no way I can live without it, feast your eyes upon "Zombie Vampire Robots from Space"!!!!! SPACE!!!!!!!!



And totally an impulse buy at around 3 this morning because I couldn't sleep, and after seeing this I REALLY couldn't sleep. I'm sure we all remember that one of the so very few things that terrifies me is a humanoid creature with goat-like features such as legs. I'm fucking scared of goat legs. View the abomination known as "Greetings from Krampus" and try in vain to resist the urge to purchase! Goat-legged Devil Man demands your $10!!!!



Update on the Zombie Brady Bunch *swoon*, unfortunately it didn't get enough votes to secure a spot in the top 3 of the family derby, cross your fingers and whatever else ya got that it's awarded a prestigious editor's pick.