Thursday, July 30, 2009

Mister Bones' Top 5

Taking inspiration from a recent rant posted by my brother on his Facebook page, I've decided that another Top 5 post was in order. The subject of this rant? The lack of quality vampire flicks in this world of ours.

It should probably be noted that while I've seen my fair share of them, I haven't seen every vamp movie in existence, and truth be told I was always a werewolf kinda guy. Vampires are ok, but give me a savage, hairy, sharp-toothed man any day.......wait a minute....ok moving on. Yeah, I like werewolves better.

However there are plenty of fine examples in the vampire movie genre, and today I'm going to list my top 5 favorites. And no, Underworld isn't going to make the list, so all you Scott Speedman fans may as well just move along.

Top 5 Vampire Movies

5. Blade II - It's pretty much a given that regardless of what kind of movie top 5 I'm doing, I'll probably try to sneak a Guillermo del Toro movie in there somewhere. This one's easy, Blade is a comic book character who kills vampires. Blade II is a comic book movie featuring Wesley Snipes as Blade, who hunts vampires, one of whom is played by Ron Pearlman. In the first one, Blade killed raver vampires, and that was all well and cool, good movie. In Blade II, he joined forces with the regular vampires (Pearlman!) to hunt a new kind of vampire that fed on both humans and vampires and had a Predator-like hinging jaw. You could also word that sentence like this: "Blade II awesome, awesome awesome awesome Pearlman awesome awesome Predator-like awesome."

4. Near Dark - Near Dark has all of the following: Bill Paxton, a script by Eric Red, a vampire vomiting a bullet, vampires that burn in sunlight, a western motif, and Lance fucking Henriksen. If you need any more than that, then perhaps you're reading the wrong blog. I was admittedly late to this particular party, I first saw it back when I originally signed up for Netflix, and I only added it to my que because they recommended it. I was completely floored though, and sad that I had spent so many years without Near Dark in my life.

3. The Lost Boys - I don't know anybody my age that doesn't love this movie. All the vampires look like members of Skid Row, and that's totally meant to be taken as a compliment. You've got the Corey's, both Haim and Feldman at what unfortunately would turn out to be the prime of their lives, a badass hair metal soundtrack, vampires that sleep hanging upside down in a cave, and what is probably the first "what the fuck" ending I ever remember seeing as a kid. Grandpa was awesome. The Frogs were awesomer. And Kiefer Sutherland never once yelled about not having enough time. My God the 80's were such a simpler, far more wonderful time.

2. 30 Days of Night - Long timers may remember me gushing about this movie at the old Batcave before it was deleted in a depression fueled drunken stupor. I hold the comic series by Steve Niles and Ben Templesmith in the highest regard, in fact it's probably still my favorite thing that Steve has written, but I said then, and I'll reiterate now, this movie makes little changes that make so much sense that it actually puts the film version just a little bit ahead of the comic. I sat in the theater alone on opening night in absolute awe of this movie. EVERYTHING worked so well for me, the setting was exactly as I remembered it from the book, the dialog was especially nice given that I had re-read the comic just before heading to the theater and recognized lots of it being word for word, and I just can't say enough about the soundtrack, which was so damn good that I hardly even noticed it was there because it blended so well with what was on screen. The absolute best part though? Well other than the overhead scene when the vampires first attacked....this movie had the balls to decapitate an 8 year old little girl vampire, and I'm not talking about a swing of an axe with a quick cut-away, I'm talking about a little girl pinned against a wall, and a couple of whacks to the neck with an axe before her little head came tumbling off. This is the kind of vampire movie I want to see more of.

1. From Dusk Til Dawn - Finally, the cream of the vampire crop. From Dusk til Dawn is hands down one of the finest examples of movie making that our species is capable of. It has absolutely everything you could ask for in a movie, great plot, gore and violence, Danny Treo, Latina strippers, and Tom Savini with a gun on his crotch. This movie even goes above and beyond the call of duty and actually manages to make me like George Clooney for about 97 minutes. "Cloon-tang" (thank you Stan Smith) has never been as cool as he was as Seth Gecko. And then it does the unthinkable, and actually makes Quentin Tarantino, who is normally a huge douche bad, actually enjoyable to watch. Society most definitely owes Robert Rodriguez a debt of gratitude. I can sense your shock at my calling Tarantino a douche, and yeah he makes great movies, don't get me wrong. But have you ever heard the dude speak? Anyway, back to the point, vampires. These are the type of vampires I like. They're monsters and they absolutely love it. It takes a while to get there, but once Seth, Ritchie, and the gang all arrive at the Tittie Twister, all fucking hell breaks loose and the movie just keeps pouring on the blood and gore until the finale. Lots of limbs flying, blood splattering, and just overall's fun for the whole family. And it's also the greatest vampire movie of all time.

I'm going to do a couple of honorable mentions this time, as I actually had a hard time not mentioning a couple of films that I truly enjoy. So on any given day, one of these could possibly replace one of the ones listed above: Salem's Lot, Fright Night, The Night Flier, and Nosferatu.

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Comic of the Week 7/29

Before we get into comics, a very special announcement was made today. After a legendary 17 season career, John LeClair is being inducted in the US Hockey Hall of Fame! This is absolutely awesome news for one of my all-time favorite players. He was a member of the Flyers from the time I started watching hockey until his retirement a couple years ago. You can read more about him if you like, here.

And now for comics. Boy that Flash/Green Lantern vs zombie Martian Manhunter brawl was fun wasn't it? Blackest Night is just fun for me. This week though we're going back to DC's other fun little even going on right now, Batman Reborn. Detective Comics #855 should be waiting for you in your pull box tomorrow! Rejoice!

Comic of the Week

In case you didn't notice last month, Greg Rucka and J.H. Williams are the creative team on Detective Comics now. I'll say that again, Greg Rucka and J.H.Williams on Detective Comics. There is absolutely no excuse for any real comic fan to not be reading this book, regardless of which character is in it. This is pretty much as good as comic books get. Would I rather the book be about Batman? Sure. It's Detective, so it's weird not seeing Batman in it, but I'm ok with Batwoman taking the spotlight for a while. She's been all but ignored since she debuted a couple of years ago, and I dig the costume. Plus if anybody's going to make her interesting it's Greg Rucka. Take it away, solicit:

"Batwoman captures her enemy, a madwoman known only as Alice who sees her life as a fairy tale and everyone around her as expendable extras � including Kate! But when the tables are turned, Batwoman finds herself in a hallucination slamming the present into a collision with the past, and the hints of a threat that will claim the lives of every man, woman and child in Gotham City.

And in the all-new co-feature starring the Question, Montoya's quest to find a missing young girl turns deadly."

Honorable mention this week goes to Wednesday Comics #4, which despite my not making mention of thus far, has been absolutely wonderful. I only wish there could be monthly comics for some of those characters that were even half as good. I'm looking at you Kamandi.

The Pull List

  • Batman Brave and the Bold #7
  • Blackest Night Tales of the Corps #3
  • Detective Comics #854 2nd print (yep, a book so nice I'm buying it twice)
  • Detective Comics #855
  • Fear Agent #27
  • Justice League of America #35
  • Marvel Zombies 4 #4
  • Wednesday Comics #4

Sunday, July 26, 2009

I are t3h smartest!

See #7? That's me! 7th place out of over 11,000 people in a round of 1 vs 100 on Xbox Live last night. Go me!

Friday, July 24, 2009

Halo Legends

Announced at Comic Con, Halo anime is on the way. Video games are getting more and more integrated into Comic Con, not sure exactly why or how I feel about it, but doesn't this seem more like maybe something that could've been announced at E3? I mean I know it's an animated movie or whatever, and not a video game, but still. It ain't a comic either, and despite the atrocious Marvel series, Halo ain't really a comic property, it's a video game property that just happens to have a comic book adaptation. Semantics I suppose, ah well. Anyway you can read about Halo Legends just about anywhere, but I got the scoop from Newsarama.

If I'm being perfecty honest, it looks pretty "meh" to me, though I'm not a big anime fan in the first place. I'm sure I'll be buying this regardless as I'm a Halo whore, and hopefully I'll be pleasantly surprised by solid animation coupled with a gripping and engaging plot complete with...AHAHAHAHAHA!!! Damn, I almost got all that out, oh well. Maybe it will be pretty at least. Anyway here's your teaser trailer:

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Comic of the Week 7/22

This week's book have a distinctly 80's vibe to them for some reason. Hair metal meets horror in the Dethklok vs Goon one shot, Dark Horse gives us the second issue of their Aliens reboot, and our favorite hockey mask wearing mass murderer is up against Freddy and Ash again in the second issue of Freddy vs Jason vs Ash: Nightmare Warriors. All of that is awesome, but they all fall just short of this week's pick, Green Lantern #44.

Comic of the Week

DC's epic Blackest Night event continues from last week's first issue. There's a lot to love here, despite what the rest of the internet may be telling you. Blackest Night #1 was awesome, believe it. Black Hand is resurrecting dead DC superheroes and villains, and he's coming after the GL Corps. Johns has been knocking Green Lantern out of the park since Rebirth, and Doug Mahnke is finally getting some well-deserved time in the spotlight. I've always said he was a criminally under-rated artist. So great start to what should be an awesome story, and fantastic art, I'm sorry but that's pretty much all I can ask for from a comic, don't know where all the hate is coming from. Marvel fanboys, no doubt. Solicit say:

"“Blackest Night” continues! As Hal Jordan and Barry Allen investigate a bizarre crime in Gotham City, they come face to face with one of their oldest allies – J’onn J’onzz, the Martian Manhunter! But their old friend is not there for reunions; he’s come for much more. Meanwhile, Sinestro seeks to rebuild his army and take his revenge on the being who would usurp it – Mongul!"

Honorable mentions this week to the aforementioned Dethklok vs Goon one shot, and Spidey reaches yet another milestone with Amazing Spider-man #600.

The Pull List
  • Aliens #2
  • Amazing Spider-man #600
  • Blackest Night Tales of the Corps #2
  • Dethklok vs The Goon one-shot
  • Final Crisis Legion of Three Worlds #5
  • Freddy vs Jason vs Ash: Nightmare Warriors #2
  • Gotham City Sirens #2
  • Green Lantern #44
  • Halo Helljumper #1
  • Myspace Dark Horse Presents vol. 3
  • Outsiders #20
  • Wednesday Comics #3

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Who's Watching the Watchmen?

Looks like Bones is. I've been one of the most out-spoken fanboy haters of this movie since it was announced, but my curiousity has officially gotten the best of me. I've heard nothing but praise for this movie from fans and non-fans alike, and truth be told, Snyder hasn't made a bad movie yet. Even the guys who come in the comic shop sing it's praises, some of whom are even bigger Watchmen fans than I am.

So after work today, it looks like I'm officially becoming a supporter. Heading out to pick up the 2 disc director's cut, complete with blue CGI penis and all. Still say the giant squid should be in it though. If Alan Moore says there's a giant fucking squid at the end, then there's a giant fucking squid at the end. Just sayin'.

Monday, July 20, 2009

Infinite Playlist - Saddam a Go-Go

I know you're probably surprised that it's taken me this long to get around to the band in this week's Infinite Playlist entry. What can I say? Honestly, I'm surprised too. Fear not though, their time has finally come. Ladies and Gents, boys and girls, I give you the awesomeness that is GWAR!

As any Gwar fan will tell you, there is no shortage of brilliant songs that are all more than deserving of Infinite Playlist fame, however I've presented myself with the daunting task of picking just one for now. I could've gone with crowd-pleasers such as "Have You Seen Me", "Gor-Gor", or even my first Gwar track "The Road Behind". I went back and forth for a while, and finally decided on "Saddam a Go-Go" from the album This Toilet Earth, as it's not only one of my favorites, but quite possibly the greatest Gwar song of all time. Yeah, I said it. Listen and enjoy!

Saddam a Go-Go - Gwar

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Dare to Touch Stan Bush

Goddammit if this don't make you happy to be alive, then don't even talk to me.

Sunday, July 12, 2009

A Bust Two Years in the Making

Here are the pics of my Gentle Giant Halo 3 mini-bust I promised. They were solicited as "Master Chief" busts, but were available in green, red, or blue. In what has to be the stupidest move ever, the color you received was random. Basically you got whatever the hell Gentle Giant sent ya. Of course being that it's supposed to be Master Chief, I wanted green, and of course being that I wanted it, green isn't what I got. Blue was my second choice though, so I wasn't totally pissed, and had completely expected to find a shiny coat of red paint when I opened the box, so I was pleasantly surprised. Enough bitching about colors though, pics!

So here's everything unboxed. As you can see, it came with a ton of stuff. There are three ways you can set him up, with the assault rifle, plasma sword, or dual-wielding spikers.

First up, my least favorite set-up, with the plasma sword. It's one of my least favorite weapons in the game, but that's not exactly why I don't like this particular pose, it's the left hand. He looks like he's giving somebody directions, and just happens to also be holding a plasma sword. I doubt mine will be spending much time this way.

This is my second favorite pose, and the one from the picture in Previews when I ordered it. It's iconic and classic looking. A nice pose that I'll likely be using from time to time. Plus the assault rifle is a cool looking weapon, and one of my favorites.

And finally my favorite, dual-wielding the spikers. It's such a dynamic pose, the spikers look great and dual-wielding really makes him look badass. I'm fairly certain that this is the way mine will look most of the time.

And there ya go, the Gentle Giant Halo 3 mini-bust. I'm glad I ordered it, despite not getting the exact color I wanted. For Halo fans, there are much worse ways to spend $55. Being that I ordered it in June of 07, and it just now shipped, I don't know if I would ever buy from Gentle Giant again. I'm a whore for things like this though, so if GG were to offer up an Arbiter bust for order, I'd likely get one. Then I would count the days until September of 2011!

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Quite Possibly the Most "Metal" Comic of All Time

Lobo in Hell vs Satan as written by Scott Ian from Anthrax with art by Sam Kieth!

Seriously did you get all that? Holy shit this thing has Metal written all over it. It should be a requirement that you listen to Cannibal Corpse or something when reading it. Here's the skinny from The Source:

You’ve heard rumblings and seen reports here and there, but, as always, The Source is here for the official word on things. So, here goes:

Starting in November, Anthrax guitarist Scott Ian will be writing a two-issue, Prestige Format series titled LOBO: HIGHWAY TO HELL, featuring the stunning artwork of industry legend Sam Keith. The series, obviously, stars everyone’s favorite Czarnian, Lobo, and I’m not putting on the hyperbole hat when I say the artwork is Sam Keith at his very best. But don’t take my word for it. We cornered DCU Senior Story Editor Ian Sattler to give us the lowdown. Take it away, Ian:

“This is everything you know and love about Lobo – extreme violence, cursing, drinking, extremer violence…Scott was born to write this series! And Sam has blown our minds every step of the way. I honestly think this is some of the coolest work he’s ever done. He manages to pull off a surprise on every page. It totally rules.”

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Back to the Battlefield

The wait is finally over, Battlefield 1943 arrives on Xbox Live and PSN today, for 1200 points and $15 respectively. I'll be grabbing it on the Xbox this time, hope to see some of you on the Battlefield.

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Comic of the Week 7/8

Not only comics to look forward to this week for those of you like me who ordered this in June 0f 2007:

That's right kids, the Gentle Giant Halo 3 Master Chief mini-bust if finally shipping just a shade over 2 years after it's solicitation! I'll take some pics and post them up this weekend once I get him home.

Comic of the Week

Enough of that though, we're here for comics, right? Right. This week's pick has a lot in common with the aforementioned Halo bust, it's been a long time coming. The prelude to DC's next huge event is finally over, and the Black Hand is set to usher in Blackest Night in Green Lantern #43. To say I'm excited about this would be an understatement of mammoth proportions. Solicit reads:

The official prologue to BLACKEST NIGHT starts here as the first Black Lantern is born! Black Hand has been an enemy of Hal Jordan since Hal's early days as a Green Lantern. But even Black Hand is unaware of the true power he holds that will connect him to the Blackest Night! Discover this villain's connection to death and the Black Lantern Corps!

Honorable mention this week goes to Wednesday Comics #1 because you can say what you want to say about the format, but most of those creative teams are not to be messed with. WC should be a fine read.

The Pull List
  • Amazing Spider-man Annual #36
  • Batman #688
  • Batman and Robin #1 2nd print
  • BPRD 1947 #1
  • Elephantmen War Toys Yvette One-Shot
  • Green Lantern #43
  • Red Robin #2
  • Wednesday Comics #1

Monday, July 6, 2009

Infinite Playlist - Get Up

Back once again, with yet another band that only I like! Found brokenCYDE a couple of months ago, on one of those albums where rock or punk bands cover hip hop songs. I've since grabbed everything I could find of theirs. They call their sound "crunk core" I believe, whatever that means. All I know is I likes it.

This track is my favorite off of their new album, I'm Not a Fan, but the Kids Love it and features the one and only Daddy X of Kottonmouth Kings fame. I'd prompt you to enjoy, but well, I'm fairly certain that there's almost no one who comes by here that will, haha. Give it a listen anyway!

Get Up (Featuring Daddy X) - Brokencyde