Friday Night Drive-In

Dismember December rolls along with our first official entry that actually takes place in December. Oh how I remember being terrified of the cover art on the vhs box of this one when I was a kid. There was just something about Santa's arm hanging out of that chimney gripping an axe. I would look at it in the video store, but never dared to pick it up and look at the back. In fact, I never actually watched it until a few years ago. It was one of those "I know I should, but I just haven't" flicks. I actually watched the entire series over the span of a weekend. The first one was good, the rest, well...let's just say things got weird and leave it a that.

Poor Billy, he had it pretty bad coming up. Watching his parents get killed by a dude in a Santa suit when he was just a kid, then spending the rest of his youth in an orphanage where he was raised by the iron hand of a horrible Mother Superior. When he finally gets out, and finds a job, they make dude wear a Santa suit and he finally snaps. This murder spree was YEARS in the making.

"You see Santa Claus tonight boy, you better run. Run for ya life!"

Knowing that this will inevitably be remade at some point, I'm going on record now as saying that I'm perfectly fine with the role of Billy's Grandpa going to Antwoine Dodson, provided the above line is rewritten into song as "Santa's climbin' thru ya window, cuttin yo people up, tryin to kill em, so ya'll better hide ya kids, hide ya wife, and hide ya husband, cuz he's killin errybody out here".